Aspire You (“We”) are committed to protecting and respecting your privacy. This policy sets out the basis on which any personal data we collect from you, or that you provide to us, will be processed by us. Please read the following carefully to understand our views and practices regarding your personal data and how we will treat it.

For the purpose of the Data Protection Act 1998 (the Act) and the General Data Protection Regulations (GDPR), the data controller is Aspire You, The Natural Health Centre, 86 The Green Kings Norton Birmingham, B38 8RS.

Information we may collect from you
We may collect and process the following data about you:

  • Information that you provide by filling in forms on our site aspireyou.co.uk (our site). We may also ask you for information when you enter a competition or promotion, and when you report a problem with our site.
  • If you contact us, we may keep a record of that correspondence.
  • We may also ask you to complete surveys that we use for research purposes, although you do not have to respond to them.
  • Details of your visits to our site including, but not limited to, traffic data, location data, weblogs and other communication data, whether this is required for our own billing purposes or otherwise and the resources that you access.

IP addresses and cookies
We may collect information about your computer, including where available your IP address, operating system and browser type and for system administration. This is statistical data about our users’ browsing actions and patterns, and does not identify any individual.

For the same reason, we may obtain information about your general internet usage by using a cookie file which is stored on the hard drive of your computer. Cookies contain information that is transferred to your computer’s hard drive. They help us to improve our site and to deliver a better and more personalised service. They enable us:

  • To estimate our audience size and usage pattern.
  • To store information about your preferences, and so allow us to customise our site according to your individual interests.
  • To speed up your searches.
  • To recognise you when you return to our site.

You may refuse to accept cookies by activating the setting on your browser which allows you to refuse the setting of cookies. However, if you select this setting you may be unable to access certain parts of our site. Unless you have adjusted your browser setting so that it will refuse cookies, our system will issue cookies when you log on to our site.

Where we store your personal data
The data that we collect from you may be transferred to, and stored at, a destination outside the European Economic Area (“EEA”). It may also be processed by staff operating outside the EEA who work for us or for one of our suppliers. Such staff maybe engaged in, among other things, the provision of support services. By submitting your personal data, you agree to this transfer, storing or processing. We will take all steps reasonably necessary to ensure that your data is treated securely and in accordance with this privacy policy.

All information you provide to us is stored on our secure servers. Unfortunately, the transmission of information via the internet is not completely secure. Athough we will do our best to protect your personal data, we cannot guarantee the security of your data transmitted to our site; any transmission is at your own risk. Once we have received your information, we will use strict procedures and security features to try to prevent unauthorised access.

Uses made of the information
We use information held about you in the following ways:

  • To ensure that content from our site is presented in the most effective manner for you and for your computer.
  • To provide you with information, products or services that you request from us or which we feel may interest you, where you have consented to be contacted for such purposes.
  • To carry out our obligations arising from any contracts entered into between you and us.
  • To allow you to participate in interactive features of our service, when you choose to do so.
  • To notify you about changes to our service.

If you are an existing customer, we will only contact you by electronic means (e-mail or SMS) with information about goods and services similar to those which were the subject of a previous sale to you.

If you are a new customer we will contact you by electronic means only if you have consented to this.

If you do not want us to use your data in this way please tick the relevant box situated on the form on which we collect your data.

Disclosure of your information
We may disclose your personal information to any member of our group, which means our subsidiaries, our ultimate holding company and its subsidiaries, as such words are defined in the Companies Act 2006.

We may disclose your personal information to third parties:

  • In the event that we sell or buy any business or assets, in which case we may disclose your personal data to the prospective seller or buyer of such business or assets.
  • If Aspire You or substantially all of its assets are acquired by a third party, in which case personal data held by it about its customers will be one of the transferred assets.
  • If we are under a duty to disclose or share your personal data in order to comply with any legal obligation, or in order to enforce or apply our terms of use and other agreements; or to protect the rights, property, or safety of Aspire You, our customers, or others. This includes exchanging information with other companies and organisations for the purposes of fraud protection and credit risk reduction.

Your rights
You have the right to ask us not to process your personal data for marketing purposes. We will inform you (before collecting your data) if we intend to use your data for such purposes or if we intend to disclose your information to any third party for such purposes. You can exercise your right to prevent such processing by checking certain boxes on the forms we use to collect your data or by unsubscribing to our mailing list. You can also exercise the right at any time to have your personal data erased, rectify inaccurate personal data or be forgotten by contacting us at Aspire You, Lifeways Centre, 30 Albany Road, Stratford Upon Avon, Warwickshire CV37 6PG.

Our site may, from time to time, contain links to and from the websites of our partner networks and affiliates. If you follow a link to any of these websites, please note that these websites have their own privacy policies and that we do not accept any responsibility or liability for these policies. Please check these policies before you submit any personal data to these websites.

Access to information
The Act and GDPR give you the right to access information held about you. Your right of access can be exercised in accordance with both.

Changes to our privacy policy
Any changes we may make to our privacy policy in the future will be posted on this page and, where appropriate, notified to you by e-mail.

Contact
Questions, comments and requests regarding this privacy policy are welcomed and should be addressed to Aspire You, Lifeways Centre, 30 Albany Road, Stratford Upon Avon, Warwickshire CV37 6PG

May 2018

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Diane’s Story

Two years ago I made the jump ….. I did a sky dive and jumped 15,000 feet from a plane in New Zealand. I knew if I could do that I could do anything.

I then returned home with my family and left a 28-year marriage, three businesses a beautiful home and a lifestyle!!!!

 The marriage in it’s final stages had become very much an abusive one.
However in the early years it was a happy marriage, driven by young love.

I married at 24, coming from a strict family upbringing.

I was not allowed to move into the house I had bought with my fiancée until I was married.

After being married for three years, aged 27, Hannah was born and at 30 I then had a son.

My son we later identified having ADHD and dyslexia.

My husband committed adultery when our son was just one.

I had a very hyperactive child who liked to wake at 5am.

Business took my husband away from home a lot and finally it became apparent there was someone else in the relationship.

These were the first cracks in the marriage.

However I chose to forgive him, as I still very much loved him and he in turn said he had made a huge mistake and he loved me dearly.

In hindsight …. which is a wonderful thing, I should have ended the marriage then.

Why didn’t I? I had two young children who I felt needed a father in their lives and I did not want to share my children of a weekend. Also who would want me with two children. In turn, one being both beautiful and hyperactive, all at the same time.

I chose to stay with a very low self-worth.

From the outset it was always a happy marriage, with dark episodes every 6-12 months. The dark episodes left me feeling very disempowered and wanting to leave the marriage. However some family event would be happening.

It was my sons birthday my daughter was graduating, my father was ill the dog was poorly…. Does this resonate!!!!

It was never the right time to leave.

We would then have a family holiday, this left me feeling, this is not as bad as I think it will be ok I just need to try harder.

I was a dedicated wife and mother, however I always worked and enjoyed it immensely. I chose to sacrifice a career, for my family, as they were my priority.

My husbands business was always his priority and I supported him in every way to enable that to become a success.

When the children were still at school I realised I was not utilising my academic skills and needed more mental stimulation.

I decided to retrain as a psychotherapist and Life Coach. This was incredibly empowering and rewarding, I felt alive again.

Having retrained I then became a senior BACP Accredited therapist.

I initially worked with children who had been sexually abused within Barnardos. I then moved on to work within Higher Education.

I eventually set up my own business with a private practise as a Counsellor, Life Coach and Trainer, winning a contract to work with doctors and nurses within the NHS.

In turn I also delivered Stress Management and Group Work to corporate clients, Jaguar Land Rover being one of those clients.

My work still always revolved around my role within my husbands business and the children.

Yes you may ask when did I sleep?  ….. I did, but had very little life other than work and my family.

Something had to give, so more of me disappeared ……

Whilst everything else on the surface looked like the perfect life.

I developed M.E.

When I was diagnosed my husband said go away for the week and have some rest… Not I will take you away for the week and look after you.

I would shower in a morning and have to lie down afterwards for 15 minutes to recover, the illness is so debilitating.

I could not even remember the way home from work. I can remember driving on the motorway thinking where am I going. I was on the M42, a journey I had done hundreds of times. I had to pull over and stop for a while until it came back to me where I was.

But I still continued to try to be the prefect wife and mother.

I overcame the M.E, again with the help of Hannah who took a week off work and took me away to a hotel to just relax and do nothing except sleep. Something I would not have been able to do at home, as my husband still if I was there expected me to do the ironing or pay the wages or whatever else needed doing. I was also privileged to be in the industry of self care and I knew from my knowledge of the illness and my understanding from a therapeutic perspective of how to take care of myself.

I had done a really good job of becoming burnt out!!!!

I was the epitome of a graceful swan on the outside, desperately paddling underneath the surface in order to keep afloat. A neighbour knocked the door one day as our new home did not have a door bell and said “What do you buy the lady who has everything”

I wanted to scream “If only you knew how unhappy I am”.

Breaking away from the marriage was the hardest yet most empowering thing I have ever done.

Yet then the next challenge came along ……. getting back into the world as a single woman!!

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Hanna’s Story

People underestimate the understanding children have of circumstances around them, from such a young age. But children are very inquisitive, they know what is happening.

People talk about a mother’s maternal instinct, I believe as a child you have that instinct within you for your parents well being and in my case very much for my mother.

I can remember many things throughout my childhood and teenage years. I can remember being sat on the corner of the spiral staircase, hidden whilst my parents argued. Throughout all of the arguments I did not need to hear the words that were being said, but just to know that everything was ok.

I can still remember distinctly I was around five and I heard my mom crying in the hall, there had been raised voices. I did not know if he chose to or, she had told him to leave. But at age five I just remember wanting to be there for her so I could stop her pain. It was later on I understood it was because he had had an affair.

You will hear people say the impact it has on a child when parents separate and you yourself will have your own opinion, of what is right and what is wrong.

Well I was a child of a ‘failed’ marriage whose parents did not separate until later on in life. A Large part of me wishes my mother had left when I was younger, because I witnessed every part of the love that was in their relationship disappear and turn to hatred.

But it did not effect my education – it was instilled in me that school and education were essential; it led to opportunities in life and gave you choices. I had left school, got though colleague, and because of my parents I went on to do a degree at Westminster University in business and fashion buying which I loved. Realizing for the first time, I am intelligent, I can achieve top grades despite my dyslexia, I just have to try a lot harder and put in more hours than others to attain it. I was able to use my passion and drive to push my capabilities, and achieve a first class honors degree.

But I know it could have been a very different story if my parents had separated as a child and it had happened during my school years.

A key part of my story is the relationship we share as mother and daughter. We have always been so close. We shared some dark times together, however we supported each other.

It helped having a mother as a therapist and counselor, although rather annoying at times for a teenage girl, I was very much aware of her understanding of human behavior, she did not miss a trick but it bought us closer.

Over the years, the bond we shared compelled me to support my mother even more. I recognise I compensated for my father.

Not being there for her when my grandfather passed away.

The emotion and pressure I felt to support her when she explained she had M.E. Begging him to be more understanding to take it seriously, to take some pressure off me because I could not always be there.

It is safe to say he always worked, he loved success but stress affected him. Work was the priority it came first before his family. I felt he did not really know me because of his absence. There are always secrets behind closed doors but to me it was clear day-to-day that there was a lot of unhappiness in my mother’s life. Although he tried to compensate with a beautiful home, nice cars, expensive gifts. It was not real, it does not build a relationship and it does not make you happy. It was just his way of showing love and saying sorry.

I knew when my mother left I would have to be very strong. I had wanted the marriage to end many years before, I question maybe if I had been strong enough to support her like I have now we might have left sooner.

When she had finally had enough. I knew it would not be easy, I knew my mother would need to be very strong to do it because my father would make it very difficult. He did not want his wife to leave that cooked, cleaned, the mother of his children, his personal assistant and joint director in the businesses. I knew how strong she would have to be, and I knew in turn how strong I would have to be.

I was right because it has been two years and there have been and still are so many hurdles. I reduced my social life felt guilty anytime I spent away from my mother, even when I was at work. I felt responsible and I knew mom had no one else that understood the pain like I did. You can talk to friends but you know they do not understand because they are not living it as you are and it is hard to imagine the raw emotion until you are. There are only so many times you can cry to your friends about the same issue.

But who supported me, I needed support in supporting my mother, as a child you want to help and being older, I did support her but I felt a big weight on my shoulders. I always picked myself up but there were dark days, times when I just wished someone understood the pain. We supported each other, as she likewise was the only person who I felt understood my pain. In the end I decided to see a counselor to help me manage my emotions, to have an outsider to talk to.

There are hurdles before you leave and there are the ones we face now. Divorce impacts your life for many years.

I am proud of what I have done; I am proud to say that I supported my mom and I would not have changed a thing. I also would not wish it on anybody; it is heart breaking, emotionally exhausting why should it have to be that hard?

The question everyone asks me is do you still have a relationship with your father. To that the simple answer is no. The pain he put me through, at this time I have no forgiveness left for him. You can only forgive someone so many times when they continue to make the same mistake for years, I did and I now have to think of myself.

A man that I am meant to feel the most love and safety from look up to and go to for advice is someone that has hurt me the most in the world. He was someone I most feared before we left.

He continues to hurt my mother and our freedom will come when the divorce comes through. We left two years ago and he still impacts our lives.

We have already overcome so much and from our situation AspireYou, has been born, in order for us to be able to help other women to make the change, to support them and to make a difference in their lives

A quote my mother showed me resonated, you have to climb a mountain before you can see the view.

We are so close now I can nearly see the view.

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